Ah school,

As a young pup I remember walking through those finely lit hallways, smiling, and tipping my hat to passers by…perhaps falling ass backwards into a hella round of duck duck gooses, Those were days where the future held no bounds. The days whereTransformers kicked ass, and the Go-Bots were gayer than He-Man.
And Those were the very days of which we were to mold ourselves into quality adults. Those were the days when I could still be an astronaut, a scientist, or even the president of these United States…

AND DAMMIT THOSE DAYS ARE BACK!
WOO! I AM FUCKING PUMPED!!!!!!!!!
SOMEONE SPIT IN MY EYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah school…

I, Through many days of soul searching I realized, that my dream to become an astronaut/scientist/the president of the united states, had taken a back seat to my second love…Smokin’ the fiiiinest cheeba, hwhoopin’ the tricks, and playin b-ball outside of the school.

Now…

Even though I have no interest in quitting any of those things, I have decided that if I am ever to be the best hwhooper of tricks, I better touch up on my maths.

At Mt. Hood community college March 29th…I did just that.

My first class was algebra, bright and early at 2:00 in the after noon…And let me tell you, I, was, exhausted!

But luckily, I was born with the alertness of a mastodon, because any normal person would’ve fallen asleep in the middle of class, due to exhaustion.

A couple things to know:

1.

This is my teacher…and her last name is Titcomb

I shit you not…TITCOMB!

Her name might as well be Boobbrush…In fact…In hindsight, I should have told her that. I’d bet Dollars to donuts, That she’s never heard that before in her young life.

Speaking of young…honestly…How old does she look? I think she might be younger than me…ain’t that a bitch.

Get Your Cyborg Name

wreck-ig-nize

Michael Jackson will be remembered as many things but…

I remember him as The One

The Only…

CAPTAIN EO!!!

So in honor of his and life and death I give you…

The Adventures of Captain EO

A Walt Disney Joint…

in it’s entirety

Part 1

Part 2

Did you see the credits?

Lucas
Coppola
Huston

Love it!!!

Thanks Michael

HEE HEE! Shamon!

I know I should be flattered that he picked me…But…He just makes me feel…….”fugly”

You want proof???

He didn’t just stop there…He put comments on pictures from my childhood and awkward teenage years…

Not even my FRIENDS were safe…

This…(holding back tears)…This was the last straw…

I’m speechless…How can someone be so cruel…what a coward…I might have to send my manager to punch him in the face.

That’s right baby!!!

Sean is no longer a dead beat…At least, not a hungry dead beat.

As of 10:30 this morning I became a proud owner of the Oregon Trail Benefits card.

Meaning…

I get free food…FOR FREE!!!

I know what you’re thinking…”Wait…Isn’t Sean already 250 lbs??? And, doesn’t he NOT need more food???”

WRONG dick

The fact is…

ROCKET SCIENTISTS discovered while working on the space shuttle “Horshack” that just one glance at a person with an OTM card will give the men and women that see the card holder, with said card, so many different types of orgasms, (Vagina, penis, butt, nose, ear, and imaginary orgasms, just to name a few) that you can actually urinate platinum afterwards.

That’ll be my gift to you

$250 a month for food…Jiminy Cricket…That’s gonna buy me alot of Boboli and Nesquik powder!!!

we’ve come so far as a country

TOPIC ONE:

I just downloaded every Super Nintendo game known to man…And have been playing Legend of zelda…for about 10 hours…I…I’m no hero but, Man I wish I had a sword…I wouldn’t know what to do with it if I did…How does one run a man through with your blade…Do I pick a broad sword, hand sword, magic elven sword?…It’s all hebrew to me.

TOPIC TWO:
Uh oh… I smell GENIUS!!!!

Heres a video of a geek…A geek that created a thing called 3D…I know…I’ve never heard of it either

The future is now ladies, and gentlemen.

The SeanPDX will go back to being updated everyday, so keep on coming back you sexy bitches.

Today I woke up with a sick feeling in my stomach. Being a king kong fuck up like myself, I have felt this feeling before. This is the feeling of ultimate dread. I still owed my roomate $40 for rent, my car had died two days previously, and I had just played the worst show of my professional career the day before. My paycheck for the week was supposed to be waiting for me at the Hutch, because I was in Salem playing a show when I would normally receive it. So I had my roomate jump my car, and off I went, driving 30 mph down division street hoping to get to the hutch before my trusty montero completely died on me. I made it about half way. For those in south east…I broke down fairly close to franklin high school. So I walked to the nearest bus stop and hoofed it to the hutch. When I got to the hutch, all my stuff was all in the corner, with a note attached to the pile. I opened it up expecting to see a paycheck…..What I saw was a letter of termination.

You see….Earlier last week, I heard from the booker of Berbati’s Pan that he wanted to see what my band radarclub (www.myspace.com/radarclubband) could do. The show was on Thursday, and for the past year and a half I have been working Thursday, Friday, and Saturday as a karaoke dj. So I lied to my boss, in order to play the show. To be honest, I felt guilty about it instantly. I knew I was walking on thin ice, but I felt that a show at berbati’s was an amazing oppurtunity that I couldn’t stand to miss…How was I to know that the show at Berbati’s would start a chain reaction of devastating proportions.

My boss somehow found out about the show….Could be because I wrote about it on the blog site you are currently reading through. Either way, he took it as a slap in the face, and fired me…After a year and a half of working for his company and becoming the best in the city at my craft. He didn’t even call me. I had to wreck my car, use 3 of my last 5 dollars for a bus ride, and walk about a mile and a half, to find out I was fired…Ain’t that a bitch.

I called him though…and I begged…I begged for my job back. He ranted about how he couldn’t trust me, how I never plugged the company, and how I was only in it for myself. I tried to tell him that even though EVERYONE has told me to disassociate myself from him and his company, that I stayed with him…Because he gave me chance to be great….When no one else would. I said “Please, don’t do this” and he said “You leave me no choice.”

This is going to sound cheesy…But my karaoke nights at The Hutch…are my life. Never have I had a job that accents me so perfectly. Every week, I would hear hundreds of people tell me that I was the best. The people I met, the drinks I had, the songs I sang, the memories and friends that I made…They all meant more to me then life itself. Performing, and making people happy completes me. It’s what I was born to do.

I now have nothing…..

nothing…

No car, no money, no job, no future, no career, and nowhere to go on my weekends.

It’s in these moments when I wonder what kind of person I am. For those who know me, they’ll all tell you that this isn’t the first time my dreams have been shattered. Probably won’t be the last either. But I know I’m a good person. Bad things should happen to bad people…Not people like me who want only to entertain, and live comfortably.

FYI:
I just deleted a whole paragraph, because it was getting too “woe is me” and preachy so…

This will be my final statement….

I feel that my kindness to others, natural talents, and general positive attitude towards life, should be worth something. I AM worth something….Even though I don’t have a cent to my name, I know that I am valuable and deserve the best. People may feel differently. People may not think I deserve the best. People may think that I’m a fuck-up, and deserve all the shit that falls on my head…Some people may even try to rip the things that make me happy, out of my bare hands…But I am not going to bow down and take it anymore. I have found my calling in life, and I’ll be damned if i’m going to let someone less talented, that has more to live for take away my happiness.

This fucking sucks…This may be the hardest thing i’ve ever had to deal with…Real talk…I might not make it…
pray for me kids…

S

P.S. After two and a half months, cold turkey, today, I caved, and smoked a cigarette. This has been a monumentally bad day….

They really should have gotten Vince the ShamWow guy to push this.

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